I. ...

Hi, I am Mohammad Thauseef.
It might seem a very formal post but I can't help it. I don't know if am alive. I don't know if I can talk. I don't know if I can hear anything else other than Led Zepplin -- Stairway to Heaven.

I am sitting hear alone and I don't remember when did the world shrink to a laptop and a wooden chair. I don't know if I can move my body anymore. Every part seems so numb. I am sure I can move my eyeballs and my fingers.
Oh no. My eyes... my eye balls.....they cant see anywhere else.
My wrists... my wrists ....are they stuck to the laptop?
My eyes they can only see how my fingers were moving. They were typing swiftly as if they were made for this. I don't remember how long it's been since I hear anyone talk to me. I don't know how long it's been since I talked to anyone.
All I remember is there was a time I used to talk a lot. What.. where are my fingers? Why can I see my friends?
I am talking. I am laughing, I see the faces of the people I like and the girl I love.
It was so pleasant, I didn't realize how good It was with them around me. I can see.... I can see the time we all were laughing together, walking together. I can see her face .... smiling at me. I remember the warm feeling when I was drowning watching her eyes looking at me.

What's that sound ? The keyboard ?
why did my typing speed increase all of a sudden?
Why can I listen my heart beating faster? Why can't I turn my head. Am I dead ??

No !! I can feel the tips of my fingers hitting softly to the keyboard. But is that all ?
Wait .... I feel something
Is it raining ?
no ... I think am in my office. Yes... as far as i remember I was in my office. Then what was it. But am sure I felt a drop on my cheek.
Am I out of my mind. It must not be my tears. Why will I cry ? I am given a large amount of stipend. I have my friends who always help me out whenever I need them. I also have a girl who listens to all my problems. then why ? Must be my imagination.

I can feel the something crawling on my cheeks. are they tears ? No. not again
I want to move my hands and clean my eyes of tears. Why don't they move ? why .. whyyyy
Why am I getting irritated ?
It stopped again. Was I imagining ? But I was sure i felt them.
Let me close my eyes.
Wait.... my eyes and fingers are the only thing which are working ?
I can't control it. My eyes. ...
What's that. My friends ? They are smiling at me. My girl ? She is smiling too. Am I crying with my eyes closed ?
But it's so beautiful. ... Why am I crying ? It's so soothing. I want to sleep. I want to sleep.
Why am I more happy with my eyes closed. My fingers ...
I don't know if I can move but I sure am. ...
I .. I .. I. ...